published on in Personal
tags: personal Am I OK, doctor? communication

Why I don't 'understand' subtle hints

Any fool can know. The point is to understand. /Albert Einstein/

It’s almost stereotypical that male human beings prefer clear and straightforward statements and all that subtle hints are completely confusing for them. But it’s not true. At least, not for all. At least, not always. Okay, at least, sometimes it’s not true for some of us.

And here I’m gonna tell some weird vision about what’s wrong with some subtle hints.

Every time I see some kind of subtle hint in communication I try to parse it and process correctly. It’s interesting that in many discussions every chunk of information has two contexts: local one (e.g. discussion mood) and a big picture.

So sometimes when I see some hint it splits the world (like in quantum physics) onto two different worlds (with different expectation) depending on what context is used. Thus the single way to continue is to choose context - and to choose the world to live for.

I have an intuitive feeling that there is something linked with cognitive biases. But in most cases I choose most realistic (safe ?) scenario making allowances for unrealistic expectations I tend to do in some fields. It’s like driving a sailing boat and make allowance for the wind. Very gusty wind I should say.

So next time you’ll have a conversation with some person like me that is “fucking blind to hints” - don’t get angry. Just give us some more context.